Choosing to gratefully receive

"I'm convinced God often wraps difficult gifts in His grace- and than uses them to display His glory. We are the ones who truly benefit when we choose to gratefully receive them." ~ Jennifer Rothschild

I came across this quote the other day. It was from a bible study I did over a year ago. It spoke to my heart the other day  as much as it spoke to my heart over a year ago. 

A lot of times we think of gifts as things we wished for, hoped for, hinted at, etc. They are things we anticipated and really wanted. It may be a new purse, a piece of exquisite jewelry, a favorite book or movie, a power tool you just can't live without, a gift card to your favorite store or maybe money towards something your heart desires. There are times we receive something that is not what we wanted or even like. Those are the gifts that we graciously accept and hope we can find a use for. 

God gives us gifts daily. It says in Psalms 68:19 that He daily loads us with benefits. It is our choice whether we acknowledge them or not. If He has allowed us to live another day, than He's got something for us. And whatever it is, it's good. 

I am learning that the gifts God gives me are not always easy to receive. They aren't always packaged in pretty wrapping with a beautiful bow. Sometimes they come in the form of loneliness, heartache and pain. Sometimes His gifts are messy or ugly. Sometimes His gifts don't make any sense whatsoever and we wonder if we are crazy. 

I keep a journal and try to write in it often. As I look back on things that have happened in my life over the past year, I can see God's hand. I can see His amazing gift of grace. I can see His strength. I can see His love and mercy. I can see how He reminded me in His word of His promises, how He spoke to me through His servants. At the time I had no idea what God was doing or even why He was doing whatever it was that He was doing. I think He is giving me a gift of trusting in Him. I haven't fully "gotten" it. That is one of those daily gifts I am being given. 

My prayer is that He is glorified in my life. Whatever comes my way, I do want God to be lifted up. I want Him to shine through me. I want my kids to be able to see me as a woman who loves the Lord, has a strong, unwavering faith and is committed to her family no matter what. I want my husband to see me as a woman who is faithful and committed to him and our kids, a woman who is strong in her faith and a support, a jewel in his life. I want my friends and family to see me as someone who will hang on to Jesus no matter what and persevere through come what may. 

I don't have it all together. (Boy, do I wish I did! But where would the adventure be in that?)

 I want to gratefully receive the gifts God gives me no matter what packaging they come in. My heart is to be open to His plan and purpose. My desire is to go with His flow for my life. I need to lay down my pride, my fears, my insecurities, my doubts and just let go. I need to stop holding on to that tattered and scarred dream and allow God to give me a new one. One that is fresh and full of His spirit. 

"Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed, Because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. 'The Lord is my portion,' says my soul, 'Therefore I hope in Him!'" ~ Lamentations 3:22-24